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Author Topic: Can we just pretend that Liz Phair died?
audra trower williams
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posted 19 June 2003 08:52 PM      Profile for audra trower williams   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
I weep bitter tears.
From: And I'm a look you in the eye for every bar of the chorus | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged
Black Dog
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posted 20 June 2003 11:24 AM      Profile for Black Dog   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Amen, audra. There's few things sadder than watching an interesting artist completely and utterly sell her soul. I've only heard the single off of "Liz Phair" but didn't realize it was her until the DJ said her name after the song was over. I was flabbergasted. What a steaming pile of M.O.R, Avril-wannabe shit.
From: Vancouver | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged
'lance
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posted 20 June 2003 12:45 PM      Profile for 'lance     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
The reviewer in my local weekly, FastForward, gave it one out of a possible five ... triangles (FF symbols, I guess). She spent most of the review talking about how she laughed her way through the disc -- laughed at it, that is, not with it.
From: that enchanted place on the top of the Forest | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
ronb
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posted 20 June 2003 01:00 PM      Profile for ronb     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Not surprised a bit. "Exile from Guyville" didn't do anything for me - bland, warmed over, Americanized, inept PJ Harvey knock-off. Mostly hype, little honest substance, spawned Alanis. Boring. Never bothered with any of the follow ups.

Gimme Polly Jean, she is the shiznit.


From: gone | Registered: Jan 2002  |  IP: Logged
'lance
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posted 22 June 2003 09:49 PM      Profile for 'lance     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
It gets worse.

The third number of The Believer includes an interview with Liz Phair. It begins thus:

quote:
GOOD SONGS

LIZ PHAIR: You know what I think is a really good song?

THE BELIEVER: What's that?

LP: I think the National Anthem is a really genius song. It's so radical if you think about it. It's about war: it's truly, authentically about people who are in the midst of a very scary situation. It's really inspiring. It's got an intense melody; it's not structured.


There's very much more, but I'll spare you.


From: that enchanted place on the top of the Forest | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
audra trower williams
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posted 22 June 2003 11:18 PM      Profile for audra trower williams   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Mmmm. PJ Harvey. I saw her play in Detroit. Ben Harper opened. Awesome.

I loved all of Liz Phair's other CD's too, though. I am taking this very personally.


From: And I'm a look you in the eye for every bar of the chorus | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged
rasmus
malcontent
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posted 23 June 2003 10:59 AM      Profile for rasmus   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
'lance, by coincidence I just picked up issue #3 of The Believer (not having seen the first two issues at all). I was intrigued enough to buy it, but I haven't read anything yet. What's your take? Judging by my once-over, it seems to be targeting the Baffler/Hermenaut demographic, with a dash of McSweeney's (PS I just can't stand McSweeney's anymore).
From: Fortune favours the bold | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
rasmus
malcontent
Babbler # 621

posted 23 June 2003 08:36 PM      Profile for rasmus   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Drat -- foiled again! I knew the layout and typeface were familiar. "The Believer" is a McSweeney's job, and I've just given them my money! Well, I enjoyed the first article I read. The one about the cannibals and all.
From: Fortune favours the bold | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
'lance
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posted 23 June 2003 08:41 PM      Profile for 'lance     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
I rather like The Believer, unlike McSweeney's, which I've always found too fond of its own Clevernesse and Ironie.

The quality's a little uneven -- I wouldn't bother with the "Dune" piece, if I were you, but then if I had the time to spend over again I'd never have bothered with "Dune" itself in the first place -- but I enjoyed the Richard Rorty interview. Of course, I'm a non-philosopher; your mileage may vary.

[ 23 June 2003: Message edited by: 'lance ]


From: that enchanted place on the top of the Forest | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
rasmus
malcontent
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posted 24 June 2003 02:48 AM      Profile for rasmus   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
I gather this Liz Phair thing is a tragedy of epic proportions. However, I confess my apparently blessed ignorance.

Light
HIGH-POWERED TABLE-TOP LASER
Approximately $500,000


There are two ways to make a powerful laser. The first is to cram as much light energy as possible into a relatively long pulse duration. This requires a huge amount of energy, necessitating large, complex structures and a vast array of generators. This was most notably exemplified in the case of the Death Star. Commander Moff Jerjerrod (the Imperial officer supervising the construction of the second Death Star) was interested in the dialogue between size and power, and an enormous laser proved to be a potent metaphor. Each of the twelve sections of the main reactor symbolized a central value of the Empire, and the resulting laser represented the unified will of the member states. The endless power grid produced sufficient energy to generate a long-lasting pulse, symbolizing the enduring glory of Emperor Palpatine.

For better or worse, this level of resources isn't available to most researchers. The second approach is to compress a modest amount of light energy into as short a pulse as possible, shorter than a trillionth of a blink of an eye, thereby creating an Ultrahigh-Intensity Field using Chirped Pulse Amplification. This method, pioneered by University of Michigan professor Gerard Mourou, proves much more feasible for scientists and family members on a shoestring budget. The necessary components cost about half a million dollars, all told, and the system can be set up on an ordinary table. An ordinary table! This laser should not be mounted on a table made from varnished driftwood. Also, the table should not be covered in a Southwestern-themed tablecloth. There should be no inexplicable sticky spots. Leave science to the scientists.

How ultrahigh is this intense field? Exactly how amplified is this chirped pulse? High. Pretty fucking chirped. This laser can create an electricity field a million times the breakdown field of most materials, pressure a trillion times stronger than atmospheric pressure, and temperatures as hot as the center of the sun (a thousand times hotter than its surface). The physical conditions that can be recreated are those that existed one millisecond after the Big Bang. This whole affair lasts only one femtosecond. A femtosecond is a quadrillionth of a second; in other words, one million-billionth of a second. There are as many femtoseconds in eight minutes as there are whole seconds in the history of the universe.

The tabletop laser can focus all this power on a spot just a few micrometers across -- perhaps the size of a newborn baby. Why would scientists want to subject an infant to this kind of wattage? That is the question being debated in Internet chat-rooms and on glossy magazine covers across the nation. The current consensus seems to be this: in order to create a Super Child that can transform nuclear warheads into pure Christian love.

Or perhaps a micrometer is even smaller than this. Perhaps it is as small as a grasshopper. Perhaps it is as small as a grasshopper's eyelash, right on the corner of its smallest eye. Perhaps that grasshopper is batting its eyelashes at another grasshopper, a grasshopper it has been wooing from afar o'er these many months. Each lash is a laser, each bat a big bang. Look at me! Please look at me! Please look at me and then love me like I love you!

It's funny that you would mention eyelashes and eyeballs and ophthamology in general. Funny how? Funny like this: Professor Mourou and his group have already shown the possibility of using this tabletop laser for high-precision ophthalmic surgery. The laser may also be useful for micro-machining with extreme precision, and for detecting transient electric signals, and for opening up new realms in astrophysics research.

For now, however, we are plagued with questions. Who can measure a micrometer? Do grasshoppers have eyelashes? Is true love hotter than the centre of the sun? We just don't know. Not yet. For now, we must wait, and wonder, and listen to the lasers.

--Akil C. Narayan and Eli Horowitz

[ 24 June 2003: Message edited by: rasmus_raven ]


From: Fortune favours the bold | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Michelle
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posted 24 June 2003 03:04 AM      Profile for Michelle   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
This is weird. How did we get so far afield?
From: I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
rasmus
malcontent
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posted 24 June 2003 03:09 AM      Profile for rasmus   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Perhaps there is, or ought to be, a connection between the laser and Liz Phair?

"The Believer" apparently has a monthly feature called "Light" where they detail a different light source and its approximate cost. This month's Believer also has an interview with Liz Phair that is truly pukey.


From: Fortune favours the bold | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Michelle
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posted 24 June 2003 03:14 AM      Profile for Michelle   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Oh! Okay, I was just confused, that's all. I see the connection now, I think.
From: I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Willowdale Wizard
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posted 24 June 2003 12:57 PM      Profile for Willowdale Wizard   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Federation of American Scientists

quote:
LizPhairs have been studied for their usefulness in air defense since 1973, when the Mid Infrared Advanced Chemical LizPhair (MIRACL) was first tested against tactical missiles and drone aircraft.

i think about her lyrics each time i have to take a plane flight ... i hate landing.

quote:
The earth looked like it was lit from within
Like a poorly assembled electrical ball
as we moved out of the farmlands and into the grid
The plan of a city was all that you saw
And all of these people sitting totally still
As the ground raised beneath them
30,000 feet down

[ 24 June 2003: Message edited by: Willowdale Wizard ]


From: england (hometown of toronto) | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged
rasmus
malcontent
Babbler # 621

posted 25 June 2003 03:08 AM      Profile for rasmus   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Princess LizPhair gazed on her homeworld of Alderaan, thinking of all those she loved going about their lives below, unaware of how close she was. Just then, Grand Moff Tarkin gave the order. A rumble like an earthquake rent the ship-world. Before them, a vast beam of light trained on Alderaan. LizPhair struggled to free herself, but Vader's grip was tight, his hand strangely icy on her shoulder. In wave upon wave of light escaping dark clouds of rock, Alderaan exploded in the Death Star's beam. Watching the cataclysm, LizPhair expected to feel horror, but instead, a new, unfamiliar emotion arose within her. Frissons of cold delight. It was decided. "From now," she thought, "I will sing for the highest bidder. I will perform like a monkey for spare change. What is honour to me now? Let them mock me! What is the mockery of the world to me now! Hahahahah, mwahahahahaha, ahahahahaha!" So was a mad, crazy star born amidst the dust of a world.

[ 25 June 2003: Message edited by: rasmus_raven ]


From: Fortune favours the bold | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Willowdale Wizard
rabble-rouser
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posted 25 June 2003 10:50 AM      Profile for Willowdale Wizard   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
a certain musical artist was on jay leno last night, hint: sounds like laser.
From: england (hometown of toronto) | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged
Mandos
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posted 25 June 2003 10:55 AM      Profile for Mandos   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Smells like Jedi spirit.
From: There, there. | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
Willowdale Wizard
rabble-rouser
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posted 25 June 2003 11:17 AM      Profile for Willowdale Wizard   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Use the Force now, it's less dangerous
Here Liz is now
Entertain us

From: england (hometown of toronto) | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged
worker_drone
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posted 25 June 2003 02:23 PM      Profile for worker_drone        Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
It's nice to be liked but it's better by far to get paid. I know that most of the friends that I have, don't really see it that way. But if you could give them just one wish, how much do you want to bet, they'd wish success for themselves and their friends, and that would include lots of money.
From: Canada | Registered: Jun 2003  |  IP: Logged

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