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» babble   » right brain babble   » culture   » Worst Lyrics Ever - nominate them here.

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Author Topic: Worst Lyrics Ever - nominate them here.
Screaming Lord Byron
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Babbler # 4717

posted 10 June 2005 10:18 PM      Profile for Screaming Lord Byron     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Yes friends, it is time. It is time to unearth the cheesiest, clunkiest, most inappropriate, sheer worst lyrics ever. Bring forth a bountiful harvest of badness so that we may judge them with our smug mockery.
Bonus points for bad lyrics by otherwise decent artists, or bad lyrics from a good song.

From a repeat offender, Mr George Michael.

'What's your definition of dirty baby
What do you consider pornography
Don't you know i love you till it hurts me baby
Don't you think it's time you had sex with me'

An old classic, one that must appear in all bad lyrics threads, by law.

'He starts to shake and cough
Just like the old man in
That book by nabakov'


a more recent piece of utter awfulosity...

We got the afternoon
You got this room for two
One thing I've left to do
Discover me
Discovering you

One mile to every inch of
Your skin like porcelain
One pair of candy lips and
Your bubblegum tongue

because if you want love
We'll make it
Swim in a deep sea
Of blankets
Take all your big plans
And break 'em
This is bound to be a while

Your body Is a wonderland
Your body is a wonder (I'll use my hands)
Your body Is a wonderland

Something 'bout the way your hair falls in your face
I love the shape you take when crawling towards the pillowcase
You tell me where to go and
Though I might leave to find it
I'll never let your head hit the bed
Without my hand behind it

and some obligatory Cancon....

Well i hoped that since we're here anyway
We could end up saying
Things we've always needed to say
So we could end up stringing
Now the story's played out like this
Just like a paperback novel
Lets rewrite an ending that fits
Instead of a hollywood horror

and, as a parting blast - I love the man, I even like the song, but I cannot defend this from Mr. Bowie.

Andy walking, andy tired
Andy take a little snooze
Tie him up when he's fast asleep
Send him on a pleasant cruise (hm hm hm)
When he wakes up on the sea
He sure to think of me and you
He?ll think about paint and he?ll think about glue
What a jolly boring thing to do

or....

Time - He flexes like a whore
Falls wanking to the floor
His trick is you and me, boy

Time - In Quaaludes and red wine
Demanding Billy Dolls
And other friends of mine
Take your time

The sniper in the brain, regurgitating drain
Incestuous and vain, and many other last names
I look at my watch it say 9:25 and I think "Oh God I'm still alive"


From: Calgary | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
Cueball
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posted 10 June 2005 10:39 PM      Profile for Cueball   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Yes very bad indeed, yet nothing really compares to this insipd 60' ballad, Mac Arthur Park:

quote:
Spring was never waiting for us till
it ran one step ahead
as we followed in the dance.

Between the parted pages
we were pressed,
in love's hot, fevered iron
like a striped pair of pants.

Mac Arthur's Park is melting in the dark
all the sweet green icing flowing down
someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'cause it took so long to bake it
and I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, nooo!

I recall the yellow cotton dress
foaming like a wave
on the ground beneath your knees
birds like tender babies in your hands
and the old men playing
Chinese checkers
by the trees

Mac Arthur Park's is melting in the dark
all the sweet green icing flowing down
someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'cause it took so long to bake it
and I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, nooo!

There'll be another song for me
and I will sing it
there'll be another dream for me
someone will bring it
I will drink the wine while it is warn
and never let you catch me
looking at the sun, oh yeah
and after all the loves of my life
after all loves in my life
you'll be the one

I will take my life into my hands
and I will use it
I will win the worship in their eyes
and I will lose it
I will have the things that I desire
and my passion flow
like rivers through the sky
oh and after all the loves in my life
after all the loves in my life
you'll still be the one
and I'll ask myself why.

Mac Arthur's Park is melting in the dark
all the sweet green icing flowing down
someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'cause it took so long to bake it
and I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, nooo!


Sung by both Richard Harris and Donna Summer, these words were originally executed by Jim Webb.


From: Out from under the bridge and out for a stroll | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
fossilnut
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Babbler # 8972

posted 10 June 2005 10:48 PM      Profile for fossilnut        Edit/Delete Post
Mac Carthur Park:

Cueball has gotten right to the heart of the beast. The version by Richard Harris can't be trumped and must be acknowledged as Plato's 'ideal' form for the 'worst Lyric's ever.

So bad, in fact, I'm surprised Van Daniken didn't mention the lyrics in his book on alien visitations, 'Chariots of the Gods' and make the case that the lyrics were actually left behind by the extraterrestrials to test mankind's tolerance of ablsolute schlock.

(edited due to spelling errors induced by the emotion wrought by the thought of that poor cake left out in the rain)

[ 10 June 2005: Message edited by: fossilnut ]


From: calgary | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
Cueball
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Babbler # 4790

posted 10 June 2005 10:51 PM      Profile for Cueball   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Cueball has gotten right to the heart of the beast. The version by Richard Harris can't be trumped and must acknowledged as Plato's 'ideal' form for the 'worst Lyric's ever.


Actually I had really hoped Will Shatner might take a shot at this, as I think that Richard Harris's lacks in certain areas and I really think Will might really bring out some of the truly awful hidden potential, that is latent in both the arrangement and the lyric.


From: Out from under the bridge and out for a stroll | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
Anchoress
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posted 10 June 2005 10:54 PM      Profile for Anchoress     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Not in the same category as MacArthur Park, but...

Afternoon Delight
The Starland Vocal Band

Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight
gonna grab some afternoon delight.
My motto's always been; when it's right, it's right.
Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night.
When everything's a little clearer in the light of day.
And you know the night is always gonna be there any way.

Sky rockets in flight. Afternoon delight. Afternoon delight.

Thinkin' of you's workin' up my appetite
looking forward to a little afternoon delight.
Rubbin' sticks and stones together makes the sparks ingite
and the thought of rubbin' you is getting so exciting.

Sky rockets in flight. Afternoon delight. Afternoon delight.

Started out this morning feeling so polite
I always though a fish could not be caught who wouldn't bite
But you've got some bait a waitin' and I think I might try nibbling
a little afternoon delight.

Sky rockets in flight. Afternoon delight. Afternoon delight.

Please be waiting for me baby when I come around.
We could make a lot of lovin' 'for the sun goes down.

Sky rockets in flight. Afternoon delight. Afternoon delight.

Repeat chorus.


From: Vancouver babblers' meetup July 9 @ Cafe Deux Soleil! | Registered: Nov 2003  |  IP: Logged
fossilnut
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Babbler # 8972

posted 10 June 2005 10:58 PM      Profile for fossilnut        Edit/Delete Post
'Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds'? How about Will doing a medley with Richard of Mac Arthur Park and Lucy?

(Richard) Someone left the cake out in the Rain,
(Will) With tangerine...
(chorus) Lucy in the Sky with Diamomnds

Richard Harris is dead so it could be one of those voice overs like Natalie Cole singing with her dead father Nat King. Shatner could be dressed like Cap'n Kirk and Richard Harris near death as in 'A Man Called Horse'.

The video director could superimpose a cake (that just happens to be left out in the rain). The gist of the video could be Shatner and Harris seeking out the Betty-Crocker recipe (sort of the Holy Grail, Excalibur type theme).


From: calgary | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
Cueball
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Babbler # 4790

posted 10 June 2005 11:02 PM      Profile for Cueball   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Yes but how would you get across the cleverly concealed sub-theme of love on the wain?

You can get a sense of what I mean by taking a quick look at William's truly awful rendition of Rocket Man by Elton John. If he can ruin a song like this think of what he could do with Mac Arthur Park!

Warning: Truly offensive content ahead.

Actually I have determined through careful analysis that Shatner's especially terrible 1978 performance, (which was preceeded by other exceptional efforts such as Harris's version of Mac Arthur Park,) is the specific moment at which Western civilization hit the apex of its cultural development and began its painful decline into complete irrelevance. To this day it remains unequalled as a truly tastless and immoral attack on what was a perfectly servicable, if not great, pop tune.

[ 10 June 2005: Message edited by: Cueball ]


From: Out from under the bridge and out for a stroll | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
fossilnut
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Babbler # 8972

posted 10 June 2005 11:15 PM      Profile for fossilnut        Edit/Delete Post
A decline in Western civilization? Perhaps. Maybe it was a mixed blessing 'the Bomb' wasn't dropped in the 60's and we all could have all gone out with a creative bang.

Donovan had some sparks of creativity but must have been on the 60's equivalent of Prozac when he wrote:

Jennifer, Juniper, rides a dappled mare
Jennifer, Juniper, lilacs in her hair
Is she dreaming, yes I think so
Is she pretty, yes, ever so
Wat'cha doing, Jennifer, my love

I'm thinking of what would it be like if she loved me
You know just lately this happy song
It came along and I had To somehow try and tell you

Those last three lines sure are creative!!

[ 10 June 2005: Message edited by: fossilnut ]


From: calgary | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
al-Qa'bong
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Babbler # 3807

posted 10 June 2005 11:26 PM      Profile for al-Qa'bong   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
I googled a Memphis Slim title and somehow came up with this

April Wine...go figger.

quote:
Well the first thing I remember, was the way she smiled
And the way she looked at me, drivin’ me wild
She was dressed to kill in her five inch heels, her painted on satin pants
She had the look of need, like, give it to me, I dedided I should take a chance

If you see kay, tell her I want her
If you see kay, tell her I need her
If you see kay, tell her I want her now

Her legs were long shapely, I could see her love was hot
And when it came together, she’d give you all she’s got
She had the walk of a woman on fire, her eyes undressed my mind and soul
I woulda gladly bet my last ten buck, in love she’d lose control

If you see kay, tell her I want her
If you see kay, tell her I need her
If you see kay, tell her I want her now


I kinda like "Afternoon Delight" and "Jennifer, Juniper."


From: Saskatchistan | Registered: Feb 2003  |  IP: Logged
voice of the damned
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Babbler # 6943

posted 10 June 2005 11:44 PM      Profile for voice of the damned     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Jennifer, Juniper, rides a dappled mare
Jennifer, Juniper, lilacs in her hair
Is she dreaming, yes I think so
Is she pretty, yes, ever so
Wat'cha doing, Jennifer, my love

I'm thinking of what would it be like if she loved me
You know just lately this happy song
It came along and I had To somehow try and tell you


I personally think that those lyrics work much better in conjunction with the music.


From: Asia | Registered: Sep 2004  |  IP: Logged
voice of the damned
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Babbler # 6943

posted 10 June 2005 11:54 PM      Profile for voice of the damned     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Time for some CanCon:

quote:
I was a workshop owner in the gulch for the people
And I offered myself to the world
I was a workshop owner
I was a workshop owner

I was a diesel fixer, fixed a diesel, diesel fixed me
What a weasel
And baby was a workshop owner
Baby was a workshop owner

Baby and me were ripe for the pickin'
That was the day we ran into Albert Flasher

It was a cold, snowy, rainy afternoon
And we were sittin' there in high school, my school
And Michael was a moonbeam maker
And Michael was a moonbeam maker

I was a diesel fixer, fixed a diesel, diesel fixed me
What a weasel, oh no
Baby was a workshop owner
Baby was a workshop owner

Baby and me were ripe for the pickin'
That was the day we ran into Albert Flasher

I was a workshop owner in the gulch for the people
And I offered myself to the world
I was a workshop owner
I was a workshop owner
I was a workshop owner


I was a work shop owner in the gulch for the people?! That just rolls off the tongue, doesn't it.

And even as nonsense verse, the lyrics don't work. If he's a workshop owner, why is he sitting in high school?


From: Asia | Registered: Sep 2004  |  IP: Logged
Screaming Lord Byron
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Babbler # 4717

posted 11 June 2005 12:26 AM      Profile for Screaming Lord Byron     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
'Slowly walking down the hall, faster than a cannonball,
where were you when we were getting high.
Someday you will find me lost beneath the landslide,
in a champagne supernova in the sky.'

As far as Albert Flasher goes, the narrative needs fleshing out - who does Albert flash? What is his motivation? Does he flash his headlights, or his genitalia? Or is this just a poor attempt to mimic 'Arnold Layne' by the Pink Floyd?

Arnold Layne had a strange hobby
Collecting clothes
Moonshine washing line
They suit him fine

On the wall hung a tall mirror
Distorted view, see through baby blue
He dug it
Oh, Arnold Layne
It's not the same, takes two to know
Two to know, two to know
Why can't you see?

Arnold Layne, Arnold Layne, Arnold Layne, Arnold Layne

Now he's caught - a nasty sort of person.
They gave him time
Doors bang - chain gang - he hates it

Oh, Arnold Layne
It's not the same, takes two to know
Two to know, two to know
Why can't you see?

Arnold Layne, Arnold Layne, Arnold Layne, Arnold Layne
Don't do it again.

[ 11 June 2005: Message edited by: Screaming Lord Byron ]


From: Calgary | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
fossilnut
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Babbler # 8972

posted 11 June 2005 12:27 AM      Profile for fossilnut        Edit/Delete Post
Canadian content shlock: The Poppy Family. The last band (and worse) I saw as a teenager. My girlfreind 'made' me take her. I had seen Alice Cooper a few weeks before this so perhaps the contrast was too much for a mere mortal to endure.

Which way you goin Billy?
Can I go too?
Which way you goin Billy?
Can I go with you?

I really love you, Billy
And all this time
I thought you loved me, Billy
And you were mine

Im gonna miss you, Billy
And though Im trying
Im hurting so bad, Billy
I cant help crying

Written by Tery Jacks who went on to even deeper depths of fuzzy fluff.


From: calgary | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
ShyViolet
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Babbler # 6611

posted 11 June 2005 12:43 AM      Profile for ShyViolet     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends,
Make it last forever friendship never ends,
If you wanna be my lover, you have got to give,
Taking is too easy, but that’s the way it is.

If you wanna be my lover, you gotta, you gotta, you gotta,
You gotta, you gotta, slam, slam, slam, slam
Slam your body down and wind it all around.
Slam your body down and wind it all around.
Slam your body down and wind it all around.
Slam your body down zigazig ah
If you wanna be my lover.


so, would someone care to explain how to "slam my body and zigazigah"? ahhh, what an irritating song!

the rest of the torture, er, lyrics

[ 11 June 2005: Message edited by: ShyViolet ]


From: ~Love is like pi: natural, irrational, and very important~ | Registered: Aug 2004  |  IP: Logged
Anchoress
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Babbler # 4650

posted 11 June 2005 12:45 AM      Profile for Anchoress     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Oh hey fossilnut, you beat me to it. I was literally *just* looking for those lyrics!

But actually I think The Poppy Family should be nominated for some kind of general sappiness award; the proportion of their hit songs that have dreadfully drippy lyrics (and delivery) is probably the highest in the world.


From: Vancouver babblers' meetup July 9 @ Cafe Deux Soleil! | Registered: Nov 2003  |  IP: Logged
al-Qa'bong
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Babbler # 3807

posted 11 June 2005 12:47 AM      Profile for al-Qa'bong   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Can Con? What's April Wine?

We haven't heard from the francos yet:

quote:
QUE JE T'AIME
(Johnny Halliday)

QUAND TES CHEVEUX S' ETALENT
COMME UN SOLEIL D' ETE
ET QUE TON OREILLER
RESSEMBLE AUX CHAMPS DE BLE
QUAND L'OMBRE ET LA LUMIERE
DESSINENT SUR TON CORPS
DES MONTAGNES DES FORETS
ET DES ILES AUX TRESORS

QUE JE T'AIME, QUE JE T'AIME, QUE JE T'AIME,
QUE JE T'AIME, QUE JE T'AIME, QUE JE T'AIME !

QUAND TA BOUCHE SE FAIT DOUCE
QUAND TON CORPS SE FAIT DUR
QUAND LE CIEL DE TES YEUX
D'UN SEUL COUP N'EST PLUS PUR
QUAND TES MAINS VOUDRAIENT BIEN
QUAND TES DOIGTS N'OSENT PAS
QUAND TA PUDEUR DIT NON
D' UNE TOUTE PETITE VOIX

QUE JE T'AIME, QUE JE T'AIME, QUE JE T'AIME,
QUE JE T'AIME, QUE JE T'AIME, QUE JE T'AIME !

etc., etc., etc.



From: Saskatchistan | Registered: Feb 2003  |  IP: Logged
'lance
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Babbler # 1064

posted 11 June 2005 12:50 AM      Profile for 'lance     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
What's April Wine?

The first band I saw in concert, as it happens.

Opening act: Loverboy.

I will say no more on this matter.


From: that enchanted place on the top of the Forest | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
Screaming Lord Byron
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 4717

posted 11 June 2005 12:52 AM      Profile for Screaming Lord Byron     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
moi, non plus.

Viens petite fille dans mon comic strip
Viens faire des bull's, viens faire des WIP !
Des CLIP ! CRAP ! des BANG ! des VLOP ! et
des ZIP !
SHEBAM ! POW ! BLOP ! WIZZ !

J'distribue les swings et les uppercuts
Ca fait VLAM ! ça fait SPLATCH ! et ça
fait CHTUCK !
Ou bien BOMP ! ou HUMPF ! parfois même PFFF !

SHEBAM ! POW ! BLOP ! WIZZ !

Viens petite fill' dans mon comic strip
Viens faire des bull's, viens faire des WIP !
Des CLIP ! CRAP ! des BANG ! des VLOP ! et
des ZIP !
SHEBAM ! POW ! BLOP ! WIZZ !

Viens avec moi par dessus les buildings
Ca fait WHIN ! quand on s'envole et puis KLING !
Après quoi je fais TILT ! et ça fait BOING !

SHEBAM ! POW ! BLOP ! WIZZ !

Viens petite fill' dans mon comic strip
Viens faire des bull's, viens faire des WIP !
Des CLIP ! CRAP ! des BANG ! des VLOP ! et
des ZIP !
SHEBAM ! POW ! BLOP ! WIZZ !

N'aies pas peur bébé agrippe-toi CHRACK !
Je suis là CRASH ! pour te protéger TCHLACK !

Ferme les yeux CRACK ! embrasse-moi SMACK !
SHEBAM ! POW ! BLOP ! WIZZ !
SHEBAM ! POW ! BLOP ! WIZZZZZ !


From: Calgary | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
fossilnut
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 8972

posted 11 June 2005 12:59 AM      Profile for fossilnut        Edit/Delete Post
World Without love: Written by Paul McCartney

Please lock me away and don't allow the day here inside,
Where I hide with my loneliness.
I don't care what they say, I won't stay in a world without love.

As my wife always asks: so is this guy still locked in his room after all these years? Did he go into his room as a forlorn 16-year-old and is still there today locked away as a pudgy, balding anemic looking Middle Aged man with acid indigestion and irregulat bowell movements?


From: calgary | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
Contrarian
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 6477

posted 11 June 2005 01:02 AM      Profile for Contrarian     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
I´m a star in New York, I´m a star in L.A.
In my life there´s no place for the man that I love
cause I´m livin my life just to sing and be free.

From LA to New York - from New York to LA

[There are verses, but none worth reading; it's quite funny reading a few blogs that are trying to remember the words]


From: pretty far west | Registered: Jul 2004  |  IP: Logged
fossilnut
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 8972

posted 11 June 2005 01:08 AM      Profile for fossilnut        Edit/Delete Post
contrarian: the sad part is that song qualified as 'Canadian content'.
From: calgary | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
siren
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Babbler # 7470

posted 11 June 2005 01:10 AM      Profile for siren     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
I think it was ZZ Top who had a hit with:

She's got legs,
She knows how to use them

I always thought that was rather handy. Nothing worse than having a date who just flops around like a jellyfish.


From: Of course we could have world peace! But where would be the profit in that? | Registered: Nov 2004  |  IP: Logged
Albireo
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Babbler # 3052

posted 11 June 2005 01:46 AM      Profile for Albireo     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Worst lyrics ever:

quote:
PAUL
Havin' my baby
What a lovely way of sayin'
How much you love me
Havin' my baby
What a lovely way of sayin'
What you're thinkin' of me
I can see it, face is glowin'
I can see in your eyes
I'm happy you know it

BOTH
That you're havin' my baby

PAUL
You're the woman I love
And I love what it's doin' to ya

BOTH
Havin' my baby

PAUL
You're a woman in love
And I love what's goin' through ya

PAUL
The need inside you
I see it showin'
Whoa, the seed inside ya
Baby, do you feel it growin'
Are you happy you know it
That you're

BOTH
Havin' my baby

ODIA
I'm a woman in love
And I love what it's doin' to me

BOTH
Havin' my baby

ODIA
I'm a woman in love
And I love what's goin' through me

PAUL
Didn't have to keep it
Wouldn't put ya through it
You could have swept it from you life
But you wouldn't do it
No, you wouldn't do it

BOTH
And you're havin' my baby

ODIA
I'm a woman in love
And I love what it's doin' to me

BOTH
Havin' my baby

ODIA
I'm a woman in love
And I love what's goin' through me

PAUL
Havin' my baby (havin' my baby)
What a lovely way of sayin'
How much you love me

PAUL
Havin' my baby
(havin' my baby)

ODIA
I'm a woman in love
And I love what's goin' through me



From: --> . <-- | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged
obscurantist
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Babbler # 8238

posted 11 June 2005 01:54 AM      Profile for obscurantist     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
I Am a Rock - Simon and Garfunkel

Paul Simon is in my mind the best pop lyricist ever. But first, he wrote this. Now I know he's just adopting a persona, and he's mocking that persona. I still find it a very annoying song.

quote:
A winter’s day
In a deep and dark December
I am alone
Gazing from my window
To the streets below
On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow

I am a rock
I am an island

I’ve built walls
A fortress deep and mighty
That none may penetrate
I have no need of friendship
Friendship causes pain
It’s laughter and it’s loving I disdain

I am a rock
I am an island

Don’t talk of love
Oh, I’ve heard the word before
It lies sleeping in my memory
I won’t disturb the slumber
Of feelings that have died
If I'd never loved I never would have cried

I am a rock
I am an island

I have my books
And my poetry to protect me
I am shielded in my armor
Hiding in my room
Safe within my womb
I touch no one and no one touches me

I am a rock
I am an island

And a rock feels no pain
And an island never cries


[ 11 June 2005: Message edited by: obscurantist ]


From: an unweeded garden | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged
Islander
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posted 11 June 2005 02:46 AM      Profile for Islander     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
And sometimes when we touch
The honesty's too much
And I have to close my eyes and cry

Enough said.


From: Vancouver | Registered: Dec 2002  |  IP: Logged
al-Qa'bong
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Babbler # 3807

posted 11 June 2005 02:49 AM      Profile for al-Qa'bong   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by 'lance:

The first band I saw in concert, as it happens.

Opening act: Loverboy.

I will say no more on this matter.


Oh, you poor, poor, lad.

Say Screaming, I sorta like Comic Strip aussi.


From: Saskatchistan | Registered: Feb 2003  |  IP: Logged
maestro
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Babbler # 7842

posted 11 June 2005 03:26 AM      Profile for maestro     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Written by Tery Jacks who went on to even deeper depths of fuzzy fluff.

I was at a house party recently where Terry Jacks was an invited guest. He did a rendition of "Seasons In The Sun" for the assembled. Got me interested, so I did a little search.

Back about the time fossilnut was being forced to listen to the Poppy Family (Terry and Susan Jacks and whoever) there was a movie producer working on an independent production in the US.

Somehow he heard "Which Way You Going Billy?", and decided to use it as the theme song for his movie.

The movie was "Billy Jack" which became sort of a cult hit, giving Terry Jacks a lot of instant credibility in the US.

So much that the Beach Boys hired him to help with their upcoming album.

While he was working with them he got them to record "Season's In The Sun" ( a Jaques Brel song translated by Rod McKuen) with a third verse Terry wrote himself.

The song was never released but I found it on a chat site thread dedicated to 'songs with useless modulations'.

The Beach Boys recording was posted there, and the poster pointed out that by the time the THIRD (that's right - third) modulation came along in the chorus, the Boys could no longer hit the notes, so they went la-la-la-la etc. while the horn section played the melody.

Eventually the Beach Boys let Terry go, and he returned to BC where one day he was playing 'Seasons' at home on his piano when the paper boy came around to collect.

The paper boy heard him and asked him if he had a record of it. He didn't, but decided to record it, and the rest is history. Sold something like 12 million copies as a single, and got airplay around the world.

So there's a guy who got struck by lightning twice. Once with "Which Way You Going" and again with "Seasons"

By the way, after he left the party, some of the guests were parodying his rendition, and getting a lot of laughs.

I guess it's some consolation to him that although this song follows him around like the proverbial albatross, at least it's paying its way.


From: Vancouver | Registered: Jan 2005  |  IP: Logged
Granola Girl
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posted 11 June 2005 03:52 AM      Profile for Granola Girl     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Ha! You guys ain't got nothing on this baby right here:

quote:
GOOD MORNING STARSHINE

La la la la la la la.....

Good morning starshine the earth says hello
You twinkle above us we twinkle below
Good morning starshine you lead us along
My love and me as we sing
Our early morning singing song

Gliddy glub gloopy nibby nabby noopy
La la la lo lo
Sabba sibby sabba nooby abba nabba
Le le lo lo
Tooby ooby walla nooby abba naba
Early morning singing song

Good morning starshine his love in your sight
Reflecting your sunlight in my lover eyes
Good morning starshine so happy we'd be
My love and me as we sing
Our early morning singing song

Gliddy glub gloopy nibby nabby noopy
La la la lo lo
Sabba sibby sabba nooby abba nabba
Le le lo lo
Tooby ooby walla nooby abba naba
Early morning singing song

Can't you hear me

Singing a song loving a song
Singing a song
Loving a song laughing a song
Singing a song
Sing a song song singing
Song song song sing
Sing sing sing sing song
Song song song sing
Sing sing sing sing song
Sing sing sing sining song......


I'll be signing autographs in the back of the room if anyone needs me.

Hey, 'lance, I've seen April Wine in concert too! It was at the Commodore Ballroom a few years ago. An ex-beau dragged me to see it. I think my first concert was - gulp - Aerosmith.

[ 11 June 2005: Message edited by: Granola Girl ]


From: East Van | Registered: Jan 2005  |  IP: Logged
Screaming Lord Byron
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posted 11 June 2005 02:45 PM      Profile for Screaming Lord Byron     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by al-Qa'bong:

Oh, you poor, poor, lad.

Say Screaming, I sorta like Comic Strip aussi.


I love Serge - he manages to get away with the most absurd ideas.


From: Calgary | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
B_Nichol
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posted 11 June 2005 03:06 PM      Profile for B_Nichol   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
From LA to New York - from New York to LA

Ah, yes... Patsy Gallant. Worst.Song.Ever.

'Mon pays ce n'est pas
Un pays,
C'est l'hiver.'
just rolls off the tongue (despite my spelling mistakes)


From: North-central-Southern Alberta | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged
asterix
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posted 11 June 2005 03:22 PM      Profile for asterix     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Most of Alanis Morrisette's "Thank U" isn't bad enough to be nominated in this thread...but the line about the transparent dangling carrots really has to be considered a crime against art all by itself.
From: deep inside the caverns of my mind | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged
fossilnut
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posted 11 June 2005 03:25 PM      Profile for fossilnut        Edit/Delete Post
Maestro, re Terry Jacks
Did he do the one:

Goodbye, Michele, it's hard to die
When all the birds are singing in the sky


Am I the only one with these songs now swirling around my head? I just caught myself humming 'Good morning Sunshine' Ignorance is indeed bliss when it comes to bad lyrics. There should be a warning at the beginning of this thread.

siren: I like that ZZ Top song and now it's ruined. Jellyfish! That's all I'm going to picture when I hear it.


From: calgary | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
skdadl
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posted 11 June 2005 03:28 PM      Profile for skdadl     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
But B_Nichol: I think "Mon pays" is a brilliant lyric. Sometimes simplicity is brilliant, and that's an example.

So many great candidates for worst above, and I'm still torn. Should I cast my vote for the Anka (don't make me think about that one too long, or I'll mess all over the thread), or is "Someone left the cake out in the rain" just still the funniest thing I have ever heard?


From: gone | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
The Hegemo
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posted 11 June 2005 04:26 PM      Profile for The Hegemo   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
The scary thing is, I was just thinking about this song before I saw this thread:

quote:

LFO -- "Summer Girls"


Yeah..I like it when the girls stop by...in the summer
Do you remember, do your remember, when we met that summer

~Chorus:~

New Kids on the Block had a bunch of hits
Chinese food makes me sick
And I think its fly when girls stop by for the summer, for the summer
I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch
I'd take her if I had one wish
But she's been gone since that summer...

Verse 1:

Hip Hop Marmalade Spic and Span
Met you one summer and it all began
You're the best girl that I ever did see
The great Larry Bird jersey 33
When you take a sip you buzz like a hornet
Billy Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets
Call me Willy Whistle cuz I can't speak baby
Somethin in your eyes went and drove me crazy
Now I can't forget you and it makes me mad
Left one day and never came back
Stayed all summer the went back home
Macaulay Culkin was in Home Alone
Fell deep in love, but now we ain't speakin
Michael J. Fox was Alex P. Keaton
When I met you I said my name was Rich
You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch

~Chorus~

Verse 2:

Cherry Pez, Cold Crush, Rock, Stud, Boogie
Used to hate school, so I had to play hookie
Always been hip to the b-boy style
Known to act wild and make a girl smile
Love New Edition and the Candy Girl
Reminds me of you because you rock my world
You come from Georgia where the peaches grow
They drink lemonade and speak real slow
You love Hip Hop and Rock &Roll
Dad took off when you where 4 years old
There was a good man named Paul Revere
I feel much better baby when you're near
You love Fun Dip and Cherry Coke
I like the way you laugh when I tell a joke
When I met you I said my name is Rich
You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch

~Chorus~

Verse 3:

In the summertime girls got it goin on
Shake and wiggle to a Hip Hop song
Summertime girls are the kind I like
I'll steal your honey like I stole your bike
Boogaloo Shrimp and Pogo sticks
My mind takes me back there, oh so quick
Let you off the hook like my man, Mr. Limpit
Think about that summer, and I bug cuz I miss it
Like the color Purple, Macaroni and cheese
Ruby red slippers, and a bunch of trees
Call you up but what's the use
I like Kevin Bacon, but i hate Foot Loose
Came in the door, I said it before
I think I'm over you, but I'm really not sure
When I met you I said my name is Rich
You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch

~Chorus~

Verse 4:

Summer girls come, and summer girls go
Some are worth while, and some are so so
Summer girls come, and summer girls go
Some are worth while, and some are so so
Summertime girls got it goin on
Shake and wiggle to a Hip Hop song
Summertime girls are the kind I like
I'll steal your honey, like I stole your bike

~Chorus~



From: The Persistent Vegetative States of America | Registered: Mar 2004  |  IP: Logged
obscurantist
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posted 12 June 2005 04:29 PM      Profile for obscurantist     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
XTC's 1999 and 2000 reunion albums, Apple Venus and Wasp Bomb. I expected much more from a group that many people consider the best English band of the 1980s. Instead, so-so tunes are filled with truly horrendous lyrics, the band falling prey to the common syndrome of wasting creative effort on coming up with good song titles.

For example, the good if cutesy song title "Knights in Shining Karma". The first line is "Knights in shining karma", and it's rarely a promising sign when the title of the song is also the first line of the song. This foreboding is confirmed by the second line, which ends in the word "armour". I mean, you come up with a cute bit of punning / rhyming wordplay on a stock phrase, and then you proceed to rhyme the pun with the same word you removed from the phrase? That'd be like Soul Asylum in the song "Somebody to Shove" rhyming "shove" with "love", which they don't, 'cos they know better.

There's a similar problem with the song "The Man Who Murdered Love", which is a marginally better song, and a bit more like XTC's old material that I've heard. The chorus is "I-i-i-i-i-i-i'm the man who murdered love / Oh yeah, now whaddaya say to that?"

Honestly, I've blocked most of the rest of these two albums out of my mind, and don't care to remember them. I sold them back to Zulu, the used record store where I got them. They may well still be there, as a friend once bought an album at Zulu that I'd sold to them some years earlier.


From: an unweeded garden | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged
B_Nichol
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posted 12 June 2005 05:52 PM      Profile for B_Nichol   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
But B_Nichol: I think "Mon pays" is a brilliant lyric. Sometimes simplicity is brilliant, and that's an example.

Agree completely. Apologies, my point was the melody was purloined for NY->LA.


From: North-central-Southern Alberta | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged
thwap
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Babbler # 5062

posted 12 June 2005 07:17 PM      Profile for thwap        Edit/Delete Post
Lighthouse: "In the Summertime"

"If her daddy's rich,
Take her out for a meal.

If her daddy's poor,
You just do what you feel."

(and, supposedly, some character named "Shaggy" has redone the tune.)


From: Hamilton | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
fossilnut
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Babbler # 8972

posted 12 June 2005 07:48 PM      Profile for fossilnut        Edit/Delete Post
'In the Summertime'. I remember when it came out. We were visiting friends in London and all the teens listened to Radio Luxembourg. It was in the summer and we sure wanted to do 'as we feel', but alas, it would still be a few more years.

There's a fellow called Ian Drury most on this forum would be way too young to have experienced. But the 'do as you feel' brings back memrries of one of his deeper philosophical moments. Some would recall 'Hit me with your rhythym stick' but how about the equally deep:

'Had a love affair with Nina
In the back of my Cortina'

Edited: Thwap, isn't In the Summertime' done by Mungo Jerry (sp?)

[ 12 June 2005: Message edited by: fossilnut ]


From: calgary | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
babblerwannabe
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Babbler # 5953

posted 12 June 2005 07:49 PM      Profile for babblerwannabe     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
whats wrong with the song "your body is a wonderland"...
From: toronto | Registered: Jun 2004  |  IP: Logged
arborman
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 4372

posted 12 June 2005 07:50 PM      Profile for arborman     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Speaking of April Wine, I once spent a day shoveling fish guts at a packing plant with one of the original band members. He seemed resigned.
From: I'm a solipsist - isn't everyone? | Registered: Aug 2003  |  IP: Logged
Screaming Lord Byron
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Babbler # 4717

posted 12 June 2005 09:38 PM      Profile for Screaming Lord Byron     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by babblerwannabe:
whats wrong with the song "your body is a wonderland"...

It sickens me.


From: Calgary | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
arborman
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 4372

posted 12 June 2005 09:41 PM      Profile for arborman     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by thwap:
Lighthouse: "In the Summertime"

"If her daddy's rich,
Take her out for a meal.

If her daddy's poor,
You just do what you feel."

(and, supposedly, some character named "Shaggy" has redone the tune.)



I always thought it was

'If her daddy's poor,
does she do what she feels?'

But what do I know.


From: I'm a solipsist - isn't everyone? | Registered: Aug 2003  |  IP: Logged
koan brothers
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 3242

posted 12 June 2005 09:54 PM      Profile for koan brothers     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Escape (The Pina Colada Song)
By Rupert Holmes

I was tired of my lady, we'd been together too long.
Like a worn-out recording, of a favorite song.
So while she lay there sleeping, I read the paper in bed.
And in the personals column, there was this letter I read:

"If you like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
If you're not into yoga, if you have half-a-brain.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
I'm the lady you've looked for, write to me, and escape."

I didn't think about my lady, I know that sounds kind of mean.
But me and my old lady, had fallen into the same old dull routine.
So I wrote to the paper, took out a personal ad.
And though I'm nobody's poet, I thought it wasn't half-bad.

"Yes, I like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
I'm not much into health food, I am into champagne.
I've got to meet you by tomorrow noon, and cut through all this red tape.
At a bar called O'Malley's, where we'll plan our escape."

So I waited with high hopes, then she walked in the place.
I knew her smile in an instant, I knew the curve of her face.
It was my own lovely lady, and she said, "Oh, it's you."
And we laughed for a moment, and I said, "I never knew"..

"That you liked Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
And the feel of the ocean, and the taste of champagne.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
You're the love that I've looked for, come with me, and escape."

"If you like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
And the feel of the ocean, and the taste of champagne.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
You're the love that I've looked for, come with me, and escape."

Sorry about that.


From: desolation row | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
Vansterdam Kid
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 5474

posted 12 June 2005 10:38 PM      Profile for Vansterdam Kid   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Anyone remember the Swedish Pop Invasion of the mid-90's?

Well this was pretty bad:

All that she wants:

quote:
All that she wants is another baby
She's gone tomorrow boy
All that she wants is another baby, yeah
All that she wants is another baby
She's gone tomorrow boy
All that she wants is another baby, yeah

All that she wants
Is another baby
Is another baby, yeah
Is another baby
Is another baby, yeah


That's part of the re-mix, the original isn't much better. BTW that classic was from Ace of Base.

And I don't think I even need to post any lyrics from Aqua to get my point across. The Hives, and some other recent Swedish imports have been much better, it's just that the pop-tartish stuff was...unpleasant.


From: bleh.... | Registered: Apr 2004  |  IP: Logged
Screaming Lord Byron
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 4717

posted 12 June 2005 11:45 PM      Profile for Screaming Lord Byron     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
This of course, could be an all-Duran Duran thread, but this stands out.

You've gone too far this time
But I'm dancing on the valentine
I tell you somebody's fooling around
With my chances on the dangerline
I'll cross that bridge when I find it
Another day to make my stand
High time is no time for deciding
If I should find a helping hand

[CHORUS]
So why don't you use it?
Try not to bruise it
Buy time don't lose it
The reflex is an only child he's waiting in the park
The reflex is in charge of finding treasure in the dark
And watching over lucky clover isn't that bizarre
Every little thing the reflex does
Leaves you answered with a question mark

I'm on a ride and I want to get off
But they won't slow down the roundabout
I sold the Renoir and the TV set
Don't want to be around when this gets out

[CHORUS]

Oh the reflex what a game he's hiding all the cards
The reflex is in charge of finding treasure in the dark
And watching over lucky clover isn't that bizarre
Evey little thing the reflex does
Leaves you answered with a question mark


From: Calgary | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
Cueball
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 4790

posted 13 June 2005 05:14 AM      Profile for Cueball   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by Granola Girl:
Ha! You guys ain't got nothing on this baby right here:

I'll be signing autographs in the back of the room if anyone needs me.

Hey, 'lance, I've seen April Wine in concert too! It was at the Commodore Ballroom a few years ago. An ex-beau dragged me to see it. I think my first concert was - gulp - Aerosmith.

[ 11 June 2005: Message edited by: Granola Girl ]


Truly horrible:

quote:
Gliddy glub gloopy nibby nabby noopy
La la la lo lo
Sabba sibby sabba nooby abba nabba
Le le lo lo
Tooby ooby walla nooby abba naba

Still the Ramones could probly make it work.

[ 13 June 2005: Message edited by: Cueball ]


From: Out from under the bridge and out for a stroll | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
Suzette
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Babbler # 7708

posted 13 June 2005 07:58 AM      Profile for Suzette     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Strangely enough, these lines from "Shake Rattle and Roll" have always sent my blood pressure up:

Get out in that kitchen and rattle those pots and pans
Get out in that kitchen and rattle those pots and pans
Well roll my breakfast 'cause I'm a hungry man

Can't quite put my finger on what the problem is there, but I'm sure it'll come to me eventually...


From: Pig City | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
skdadl
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 478

posted 13 June 2005 08:00 AM      Profile for skdadl     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Sex?

B.Nichol, my apologies. I was being a bad thread reader to miss that point.


From: gone | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Scott Piatkowski
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Babbler # 1299

posted 13 June 2005 10:41 AM      Profile for Scott Piatkowski   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by fossilnut:
contrarian: the sad part is that song qualified as 'Canadian content'.

Twice over. The tune is "adapted" from Gilles Vigneault.

[Edited to add: Looks like someone else already pointed that out ]

Here's another nomination. Heard it on the "oldies" station a while ago and just went Ewwwwww!!!

quote:
Into the Night
Benny Mardones

She's just sixteen years old
Leave her alone, they say
Separated by fools
Who don't know what love is yet
But I want you to know -

CHORUS:
If I could fly
I'd pick you up
I'd take you into the night
And show you a love
Like you've never seen - ever seen.

It's like having a dream
Where nobody has a heart
It's like having it all
And watching it fall apart
And I would wait till the end of time for you
And do it again, it's true
I can't measure my love
There's nothing to compare it to
But I want you to know -

CHORUS


[ 13 June 2005: Message edited by: Scott Piatkowski ]


From: Kitchener-Waterloo | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged
thwap
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 5062

posted 13 June 2005 12:29 PM      Profile for thwap        Edit/Delete Post
Yeah, it was "Mungo Jerry."


Whatever happened to classy performers like this guy anyway? The stuff these kids listen to today is just ridiculous.


From: Hamilton | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
'lance
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 1064

posted 13 June 2005 12:41 PM      Profile for 'lance     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Speaking of April Wine, I once spent a day shoveling fish guts at a packing plant with one of the original band members. He seemed resigned.

A few years back I sat next to one of the members of Prism on a WestJet flight from Edmonton to Vancouver. They and the Headpins had just played a gig in Wainwright.

Speaking of CanCon, no bad-lyrics thread can be complete without...

quote:
And now, the end is near; And so I face the final curtain.
My friend, I'll say it clear, I'll state my case, of which I"m certain.
I've lived a life that's full. I've traveled each and ev'ry highway;
But more, much more than this, I did it my way.

Regrets, I've had a few; But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do And saw it through without exemption.
I planned each charted course; Each careful step along the byway,
But more, much more than this, I did it my way.

Yes, there were times, I'm sure you knew when I bit off more than I could chew.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
I ate it up and spit it out.
I faced it all and I stood tall; And did it my way.

I've loved, I've laughed and cried.
I've had my fill; my share of losing.
And now, as tears subside, I find it all so amusing.
To think I did all that; And may I say - not in a shy way,
"No, oh no not me, I did it my way".

For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels; And not the words of one who kneels.
The record shows I took the blows - And did it my way.


quote:
Maestro, re Terry Jacks
Did he do the one:
Goodbye, Michele, it's hard to die
When all the birds are singing in the sky

He did. That too was originally a French song, by Jacques Brel, though the lyrics were simply translated rather than re-written as with "My Way."

[ 13 June 2005: Message edited by: 'lance ]


From: that enchanted place on the top of the Forest | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
voice of the damned
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 6943

posted 13 June 2005 01:10 PM      Profile for voice of the damned     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Speaking of CanCon, no bad-lyrics thread can be complete without...


quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And now, the end is near; And so I face the final curtain.
My friend, I'll say it clear, I'll state my case, of which I"m certain.
I've lived a life that's full. I've traveled each and ev'ry highway;
But more, much more than this, I did it my way.
Regrets, I've had a few; But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do And saw it through without exemption.
I planned each charted course; Each careful step along the byway,
But more, much more than this, I did it my way.

Yes, there were times, I'm sure you knew when I bit off more than I could chew.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
I ate it up and spit it out.
I faced it all and I stood tall; And did it my way.

I've loved, I've laughed and cried.
I've had my fill; my share of losing.
And now, as tears subside, I find it all so amusing.
To think I did all that; And may I say - not in a shy way,
"No, oh no not me, I did it my way".

For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels; And not the words of one who kneels.
The record shows I took the blows - And did it my way.


Anyone remember Anka singing that with altered lyrics at Pierre Trudeau's televised farewell bash? It was painful.

"He made history/with national energy"

"He stuck out his neck/and said to Levesque/No way!!"

[ 13 June 2005: Message edited by: voice of the damned ]


From: Asia | Registered: Sep 2004  |  IP: Logged
'lance
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 1064

posted 13 June 2005 01:11 PM      Profile for 'lance     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
"He made history/with national energy"

"He stuck out his neck/and said to Levesque/No way!!"


Dear Gawd in Heaven. I hadn't heard about that, but it must be true. It's too awful not to be.


From: that enchanted place on the top of the Forest | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
voice of the damned
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 6943

posted 13 June 2005 01:18 PM      Profile for voice of the damned     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"He made history/with national energy"
"He stuck out his neck/and said to Levesque/No way!!"


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Gawd in Heaven. I hadn't heard about that, but it must be true. It's too awful not to be.


Indeed it is true. To paraphrase another bad Canadian lyricist who made it big south of the border: I saw that, I was there!!

quote:
The Americans....

This Canadian thinks it is time to speak up for the Americans as the most generous
and possibly the least-appreciated people in all the earth.

The United States Dollar took another pounding on German, French and British exchanges
this morning, hitting the lowest point ever known in West Germany. It has declined there by 41%
since 1971 and this Canadian thinks it is time to speak up for the Americans as the most generous
and possibly the least-appreciated people in all the earth.

As long as sixty years ago, when I first started to read newspapers, I read of floods on the
Yellow River and the Yangtse. Who rushed in with men and money to help? The Americans did.
They have helped control floods on the Nile, the Amazon, the Ganges and the Niger.
Today, the rich bottom land of the Mississippi is under water
and no foreign land has sent a dollar to help.

Germany, Japan and, to a lesser extent, Britain and Italy, were lifted out of the debris of war
by the Americans who poured in billions of dollars and forgave other billions in debts.
None of those countries is today paying even the interest on its remaining debts to the United States.

When the franc was in danger of collapsing in 1956, it was the Americans who propped it up
and their reward was to be insulted and swindled on the streets of Paris.
I was there. I saw it.

When distant cities are hit by earthquakes, it is the United States that hurries in to help.
Managua Nicaragua is one of the most recent examples. So far this spring, 59 American
communities have been flattened by tornadoes. Nobody has helped.

The Marshall Plan. The Truman Policy.
All pumped billions upon billions of dollars into discouraged countries.
Now, newspapers in those countries are writing about the decadent war-mongering Americans.
You talk about Japanese technocracy and you get radios.
You talk about German technocracy and you get automobiles.
You talk about American technocracy and you find men on the moon,
not once, but several times, and safely home again.

When the railways of France, Germany and India were breaking down through age,
it was the Americans who rebuilt them. When the Pennsylvania Railroad and the New York Central
went broke, nobody loaned them an old caboose. Both are still broke.

I can name to you 5,000 times when the Americans raced to the help of other people in trouble.
Can you name me even one time when someone else raced to the Americans in trouble?
I don't think there was outside help even during the San Francisco earthquake.

Our neighbours have faced it alone
and I am one Canadian who is damned tired of hearing them kicked around.
They will come out of this thing with their flag high. And when they do,
they are entitled to thumb their nose at the lands that are gloating over their present troubles.
I hope Canada is not one of these. But there are many smug, self-righteous Canadians.

And finally, the American Red Cross was told at its 48th Annual meeting
in New Orleans this morning that it was broke.
This year's disasters, with the year less than half-over, have taken it all

... and nobody, but nobody has helped.



From: Asia | Registered: Sep 2004  |  IP: Logged
'lance
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 1064

posted 13 June 2005 01:22 PM      Profile for 'lance     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Yeah, no two ways about it, Gordon Sinclair's solo work wasn't his best. He did much better with the Tragically Hip.
From: that enchanted place on the top of the Forest | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
wedge_oli
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posted 13 June 2005 02:39 PM      Profile for wedge_oli     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
How about the chorus of Coldplay's "Clocks":

Yoooooooooooooooooooooo....... Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Yoooooooooooooooooooooo....... Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Yoooooooooooooooooooooo....... Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Yoooooooooooooooooooooo....... Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh


From: Montreal, QC and St. Catharines Ontario | Registered: Jun 2004  |  IP: Logged
Fartful Codger
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Babbler # 9019

posted 13 June 2005 04:08 PM      Profile for Fartful Codger     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
A classically bad song:
Eric Carmen
quote:
When I was young
I never needed anyone
And makin’ love was just for fun
Those days are gone

Livin’ alone
I think of all the friends I’ve known
But when I dial the telephone
Nobody’s home

All by myself
Don’t wanna be
All by myself anymore
All by myself
Don’t wanna live
All by myself anymore

Hard to be sure
Some times I feel so insecure
And love so distant and obscure
Remains the cure

All by myself
Don’t wanna be
All by myself anymore
All by myself
Don’t wanna live
All by myself anymore


AFA April Wine goes, I admit I love the music, although the lyrics...

quote:
Every night I rock myself to sleep
Thinkin' about you
Thinkin' about you

Speaking about wanking songs, howzabout Billy Idol

quote:
I'll be dancing with myself (oh oh)
Dancing with myself
Well, with nothing to lose, I got nothing to prove
So I'll be dancing with myself (oh oh oh oh)

From: In my chair | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
jeff house
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 518

posted 13 June 2005 05:51 PM      Profile for jeff house     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet, green icing flowing down
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'Cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, no!

Oh yes! That's a real song.


From: toronto | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Michelle
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Babbler # 560

posted 13 June 2005 07:07 PM      Profile for Michelle   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
One of my all-time favorites:

quote:
Say you, say me,
Say it for always,
That's the way it should be

Say you, say me
Say it together
Naturally.


Say what?

Another favorite:

quote:
One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do
Two can be as bad as one, its the loneliest number since the number one
No is the saddest experience you'll ever know
Yes it's the saddest experience you'll ever know
cause one is the loneliest number that you'll ever know
one is the loneliest number even worst then two
yeah

So, make up your mind. Is one the loneliest number or two?

[ 13 June 2005: Message edited by: Michelle ]


From: I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Michelle
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posted 13 June 2005 07:12 PM      Profile for Michelle   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Then there are Beatles' lyrics like "I Am The Walrus" and "Strawberry Fields Forever". But it is verboten to make fun of Beatles lyrics. I have spoken.

Oh wow. Check this out - Strawberry Fields Forever KAREOKE.

[ 13 June 2005: Message edited by: Michelle ]


From: I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
skdadl
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posted 13 June 2005 07:15 PM      Profile for skdadl     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Michelle: You gotta problem wid Strawberry Fields? Wanna step outside?
From: gone | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Coyote
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posted 13 June 2005 07:16 PM      Profile for Coyote   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
The girl with Colitis goes by . . .
From: O’ for a good life, we just might have to weaken. | Registered: Jan 2004  |  IP: Logged
Michelle
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posted 13 June 2005 07:17 PM      Profile for Michelle   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Are you kidding? I LOVE Strawberry Fields, and pretty much every other Beatles song. (Which is why I have declared making fun of Beatles songs verboten.) But, well, you have to admit, the lyrics are a little odd. That is, you can't, you know, tune in, but it's all right. That is, I think it's not too bad.
From: I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
'lance
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posted 13 June 2005 08:08 PM      Profile for 'lance     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Forgive me, Michelle -- but I nominate the Beatles' "Michelle" as just about the least listenable of their songs, with the exception of some dreck on the White Album.
From: that enchanted place on the top of the Forest | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
Michelle
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Babbler # 560

posted 13 June 2005 08:11 PM      Profile for Michelle   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
I'd say that it was the least listenable Beatles song too, 'lance, but since I've been listening to it (involuntarily, I assure you!) all my life...

Actually, I kind of like the Beatles' version of Michelle. The 85,000 lay versions I've heard throughout my life, I probably could have done without.


From: I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
'lance
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posted 13 June 2005 08:15 PM      Profile for 'lance     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
"Lay versions" -- I like that. Does that mean amateur versions, or all covers?
From: that enchanted place on the top of the Forest | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
fossilnut
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Babbler # 8972

posted 13 June 2005 08:19 PM      Profile for fossilnut        Edit/Delete Post
My sister's name is 'Michelle' and whenever I wanted to get her rattled I'd start singing the song with my own words:

What boy with a sister named Michelle never sang"

'Michelle, you smell'

We were decades ahead of Bart Simpson.


From: calgary | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
Michelle
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Babbler # 560

posted 13 June 2005 08:35 PM      Profile for Michelle   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by 'lance:
"Lay versions" -- I like that. Does that mean amateur versions, or all covers?

That means the versions from every teacher I've had since kindergarten, and most people I've met since, oh, BIRTH. Actually, I don't mind it so much, really.

As for you, fossilnut...hardeeharhar. How original!


From: I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
fossilnut
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 8972

posted 14 June 2005 12:21 AM      Profile for fossilnut        Edit/Delete Post
quote:
As for you, fossilnut...hardeeharhar. How original!

At the time, as a pre-teen, I thought I was quite witty. Looking back it was not my most creative moment of creativity.

Woe be to the child who has a name that rhymes with unsavory words. Also, woe be to the pre-adult who has a popular song come out with their first name in the title. The song is mentioned in this thread 'Which way you going, Billy.' The song came out when I was entering high school and for the next two years my friend, Billy, could not walk down the hall without, indeed, hearing those words directed at him 'Which way you going, Billy'.

[ 14 June 2005: Message edited by: fossilnut ]


From: calgary | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
ronb
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 2116

posted 14 June 2005 12:36 AM      Profile for ronb     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Live is life. By the indescribable Opus.

Nanananana
Nanananana (all together now)
Nanananana
Nanananana

Life (nanananana)
Life is life (nanananana)
Labadab dab dab life (nanananana)
Liiiiiiiife (nanananana)

When we all give the power
We all give the best
Every minute of an hour
Don't think about the rest
And you all get the power
You all get the best
When everyone gets everything
And every song everybody sings

Life is life (nanananana)
Life is life (nanananana)
Life is life (nanananana)
Labadab dab dab life (nanananana)

Be thankful I am not going to include the lyrics to Take On Me by the unspeakably gorgeous and equally Englishly challenged A-Ha.


From: gone | Registered: Jan 2002  |  IP: Logged
al-Qa'bong
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 3807

posted 14 June 2005 01:56 AM      Profile for al-Qa'bong   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Well, I think Patrick Hernandez's disco anthem Born to be Alive trumps the previous post.

quote:
We were born to be alive
We were born to be alive

Born, born to be alive
(Won't you be alive)
You see you were born
Born, born
(Born to be alive)

People ask me why
I never find a place to stop
And settle down, down, down
But I never wanted all those things
People need to justify
Their lives, lives, lives

You see you were
Born, born, born to be alive
(Born to be alive)
You see you were
Born, born, born
(Born to be alive)
It's good to be alive
To be alive
To be alive

It's good to be alive
To be alive
To be alive


I saw a couple of people on a French TV bio talking about Hernandez, this song, and the incredible wealth and fame it brought him.

After translating the words into French, they kinka looked at each other in amazement and shrugged, "Is that it?"

[ 14 June 2005: Message edited by: al-Qa'bong ]


From: Saskatchistan | Registered: Feb 2003  |  IP: Logged
RP.
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 7424

posted 14 June 2005 08:34 AM      Profile for RP.     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:

Horomones blazing at the speed of light
But that don't mean it's gonna be tonight
Baby, baby


"Genie in a bottle," by whoever sings that song.


From: I seem to be having tremendous difficulty with my lifestyle | Registered: Nov 2004  |  IP: Logged
obscurantist
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 8238

posted 14 June 2005 05:05 PM      Profile for obscurantist     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
For lyrics and vocal delivery that are so bad they are good, my favourite musician is the Cult's Ian Astbury. The wannabe demon spawn of James Morrison and Robert Plant, Astbury's excesses are best displayed on the album "Ceremony". Going from memory:

White
Wha-hyte
Shining
Shining brightly
(from the song "White")

Indian woman
Let down your hair
Indian woman
Let down your hay-hair
Standing at the edge of the world
Please help me girl
Please help me girl
("Indian")

Don't take me too lightly
I got the blues power baby
I'm just a breed of society
Pushin' hard and stealin' free
Don't try to lay no
Trip on me
Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeah
Cuz I'm a
Wild
Hearted son
I'm comin' down like a rollin' stone
Hey mama
The world did not want me to roam
("Wild Hearted Son")

Need some heart of soul
In the world today
Need some heart of soul, now
In the world today!
Little bitta heart a'soul now
Little bitta heart a'soul now
Little bitta heart of so-so-so-so-so-hoooole
Ya gotta BLEED a little while yer singin'! (yeah-ee-yeah-ee-yea-hah)
Lest the words, don't mean no thing (No, they DON'T, no!)
Gotta get to the heart of soul
(final chorus from "Heart of Soul")

And my favourite passage from the album is a spoken passage (forget in which song), part of which may be borrowed from somewhere else:

"When barbarians appear at the gates of a civilization, it is a sign of crisis in that civilization. When the barbarians appear carrying flowers and singing songs of peace, it is a sign that the crisis is one of a spiritual nature. We have lost touch with our spiritual nature, because we are wrapped up in so much shit, all day, all night...."

Thing is, I LIKE these lyrics and these songs. Think it's neat that the Doors are touring again with Astbury as lead singer. Bizarre, but it makes sense somehow.


From: an unweeded garden | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged
Screaming Lord Byron
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 4717

posted 14 June 2005 10:10 PM      Profile for Screaming Lord Byron     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
What's that awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful dirge that's kinda current right now that goes 'I don't wanna know, but I guess I know, yeah - I think I know, I just hate how it sounds'?
That is possibly the worst set of lines I have ever heard.

From: Calgary | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
ronb
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 2116

posted 14 June 2005 11:43 PM      Profile for ronb     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Well, I think Patrick Hernandez's disco anthem Born to be Alive trumps the previous post.

I beg to differ, if only because Born to be Alive actually makes a tiny bit of sense. It is possible to glean some meaning from it, however insignificant it might be.

It became a very annoying commercial, however. Extra points for that.


From: gone | Registered: Jan 2002  |  IP: Logged
obscurantist
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 8238

posted 15 June 2005 01:55 AM      Profile for obscurantist     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by Screaming Lord Byron:
What's that awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful, awful dirge that's kinda current right now that goes [DELETED]That is possibly the worst set of lines I have ever heard.

Second that. They play it at my supermarket along with much better stuff like Badfinger and Supertramp.

I don't really want to know who does that song. Sounds like the same people who did the equally terrible "Here Without You" song from the other year. No, not "Here Without You" by the Byrds. Probably Nickelback or some such luminaries.


From: an unweeded garden | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged
Hephaestion
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 4795

posted 15 June 2005 05:33 AM      Profile for Hephaestion   Author's Homepage        Edit/Delete Post
A troika of dreck...

quote:
Mandy
by Barry Manilow

I remember all my life
Raining down as cold as ice
A shadow of a man
A face through a window
Crying in the night
The night goes into

Morning, just another day
Happy people pass my way
Looking in their eyes
I see a memory
I never realized
How happy you made me oh Mandy

[Chorus:]
Well you came and you gave without taking
But I sent you away, oh Mandy
Well you kissed me and stopped me from shaking
And I need you today, oh Mandy

I'm standing on the edge of time
I Walked away when love was mine
Caught up in a world of uphill climbing
The tears are in my mind
And nothing is rhyming, oh Mandy

[Chorus]

Yesterday's a dream I face the morning
Crying on the breeze
The pain is calling, oh Mandy

[Chorus]

You came and you gave without taking
But I sent you away, oh Mandy
You kissed me and stopped me from shaking
And I need you...


quote:
Wildfire
by Michael Martin Murphey

She comes down from Yellow Mountain
On a dark, flat land she rides
On a pony she named Wildfire
With a whirlwind by her side
On a cold Nebraska night

Oh, they say she died one winter
When there came a killing frost
And the pony she named Wildfire
Busted down its stall
In a blizzard he was lost

She ran calling Wildfire [x3]
By the dark of the moon I planted
But there came an early snow
There's been a hoot-owl howling by my window now
For six nights in a row
She's coming for me, I know
And on Wildfire we're both gonna go

We'll be riding Wildfire [x3]

On Wildfire we're gonna ride
Gonna leave sodbustin' behind
Get these hard times right on out of our minds
Riding Wildfire


quote:
Baby, I'm-a want you
by David Gates

Baby, I'm-a want you
Baby, I'm-a need you
You the only one I care enough to hurt about
Maybe I'm-a crazy
But I just can't live without...

Your lovin' and affection
Givin' me direction
Like a guiding light to help me through my darkest hour
Lately I'm a-prayin'
That you'll always be a-stayin' beside me

Used to be my life was just emotions passing by
Feeling all the while and never really knowing why...

Lately I'm a-prayin'
That you'll always be a-stayin' beside me.

Used to be my life was just emotions passing by
Then you came along and made me laugh
And made me cry...
You taught me why...

Baby, I'm-a want you
Baby, I'm-a need you

Oh, it took so long to find you, baby

Baby, I'm-a want you
Baby, I'm-a need you



From: goodbye... :-( | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
Suzette
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Babbler # 7708

posted 15 June 2005 05:59 AM      Profile for Suzette     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Oh sweet Jesus. I grew up with a mother who {whisper} played Barry Manilow all the time. I knew every word in that damn song before you typed it out, Heph. And now it's going to be in my head for days. For shame. {/whisper}
From: Pig City | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
Anchoress
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Babbler # 4650

posted 15 June 2005 06:03 AM      Profile for Anchoress     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Hum, Wildfire, thanks for the reminder (I think). When I was about eight, I read a trilogy of modern, gothic, paranormal romances (very seventies) that I was a little too young to fully understand. I don't remember exactly, but I think in one of them the hero's (if you could call him that, anti-hero is probably better for that genre) wife died in a similar manner to the Wildfire song...

My imagination was so acute, and my reaction so visceral, that for several years whenever I heard that song I almost went into a hallucinatory state.


From: Vancouver babblers' meetup July 9 @ Cafe Deux Soleil! | Registered: Nov 2003  |  IP: Logged
maestro
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Babbler # 7842

posted 15 June 2005 06:36 AM      Profile for maestro     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Anybody mentioned Billy Joel yet?

Not every song he wrote was ridiculous, but enough of them were to convince me he should have stuck with melodies and left the lyrics to someone else.

Specifically there was a song in which he actually had the words, 'stick with me babe and...'

Then there's this:

quote:
Well, you wish you were back in the good old days
When tomatoes were cheaper

And you never heard the words of your favorite songs
Through a three inch speaker

And you never messed around with dangerous drugs
You were all getting sick on beer

And you didn't get any unless you went steady and made out for a year


Could be the basis of a rock trivia question,'What does the price of tomatoes have to do with rock and roll?'


From: Vancouver | Registered: Jan 2005  |  IP: Logged
maestro
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Babbler # 7842

posted 15 June 2005 06:42 AM      Profile for maestro     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Stumbled on this one when I was searching for Billy Joel lyrics.

Mario Winans...I have no idea who that is

That I don’t want to let you go
And I don’t want to let you leave
Cant say I didn’t let you breath
Gave you extra cheese(c'mon)Put you in the SUV

You wanted ice So I made you freeze
Made you hot
Like the West Indies
Now it's time you invest in me
Cuz if not then its best you leave
holla yeah

Forgot to mention the pickle...


From: Vancouver | Registered: Jan 2005  |  IP: Logged
Hephaestion
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 4795

posted 15 June 2005 06:54 AM      Profile for Hephaestion   Author's Homepage        Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by Suzette:
And now it's going to be in my head for days. For shame.[/i] {/whisper}

Oooops! Sawwwwwwwwrry!


From: goodbye... :-( | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
Gir Draxon
leftist-rightie and rightist-leftie
Babbler # 3804

posted 15 June 2005 07:15 AM      Profile for Gir Draxon     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by wedge_oli:
How about the chorus of Coldplay's "Clocks":

Yoooooooooooooooooooooo....... Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Yoooooooooooooooooooooo....... Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Yoooooooooooooooooooooo....... Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Yoooooooooooooooooooooo....... Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh


"You are", as in, "You are... home, home, where I wanted to go"


From: Arkham Asylum | Registered: Feb 2003  |  IP: Logged
Gir Draxon
leftist-rightie and rightist-leftie
Babbler # 3804

posted 15 June 2005 07:24 AM      Profile for Gir Draxon     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by RP.:

"Genie in a bottle," by whoever sings that song.

Christina Aguilera (sp?)

My nomination: Inner Circle's Sweat

quote:
Girl I want to make you sweat
Sweat till you can't sweat no more
And if you cry out
I'm gonna push it some mo-o-ore
Girl I want to make you sweat
Sweat till you can't sweat no more
And if you cry out
I'm gonna push it
Push it, push it some more

A La La La La Long
A La La La La Long Long
Li Long Long Long.



From: Arkham Asylum | Registered: Feb 2003  |  IP: Logged
obscurantist
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 8238

posted 15 June 2005 02:41 PM      Profile for obscurantist     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by Michelle:
One of my all-time favorites:

Two can be as bad as one, its the loneliest number since the number one

So, make up your mind. Is one the loneliest number or two?


The Who resolve this apparent contradiction in their song "Bargain" from Who's Next:

One and one
Don't make two
One and one make one

So you see, it depends whether you ADD one and one together, or MULTIPLY them.

Of course, in the same song they also say that:

To catch you
I'm gonna drown an unsung man

Which is all well and good for them, but I wonder how the unsung man feels about it?


From: an unweeded garden | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged
jeff house
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 518

posted 15 June 2005 06:05 PM      Profile for jeff house     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
And, from about 1962:

MY BOY LOLLIPOP

quote:
My boy lollipop
You make my heart go giddyup
You are as sweet as candy
You're my sugar dandy

Woah My boy lollipop
Never ever leave me
Because it would grieve me
My heart told me so

I love you I love you I love you so
But I don't want you to know
I need you I need you I need you so
And I'll never let you go



From: toronto | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Hinterland
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 4014

posted 15 June 2005 06:11 PM      Profile for Hinterland        Edit/Delete Post
I love that song. You can use it as milestone for tracing the development of Jamaican music, from ska, rock steady to reggae. And, I just like ska.
From: Québec/Ontario | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
Big D
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 9331

posted 17 June 2005 03:22 AM      Profile for Big D        Edit/Delete Post
Lyrics from "Why Can't This Be Love" by Van Halen:

"I tell myself, hey only fools rush in
Only time will tell if we stand the test of time."

No shit, Sherlock.


From: Half man, Half Horse! | Registered: May 2005  |  IP: Logged
beibhnn
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 3178

posted 17 June 2005 10:25 AM      Profile for beibhnn     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Worst song of all time. Ohio Express' Yummy Yummy Yummy. To preserve the sanity of babblers, I'll on post the first chorus but you can find the rest of the lyrics here.

quote:
Yummy, Yummy, Yummy, I got love in my tummy
And I feel like a-lovin you
Love, you're such a sweet thing
Good enough to eat thing
And it's just a-what I'm gonna do

Ooh love to hold ya
Ooh love to kiss ya
Ooh love I love it so
Ooh love you're sweeter
Sweeter than sugar
Ooh love
I wont let you go


One of the Ohio Express members went on to be the entertainment critic for the Edmonton Journal. Insert jokes about the quality of Edmonton culture and entertainment here...


From: in exile | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
Crippled_Newsie
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 7024

posted 17 June 2005 10:40 AM      Profile for Crippled_Newsie     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by beibhnn:
Worst song of all time. Ohio Express' Yummy Yummy Yummy...


I just saw a show on VH1 called Bubblegum Babylon, and the composer of Yummy confirms that, yes, it is a paen to that which we all surmised.


From: It's all about the thumpa thumpa. | Registered: Oct 2004  |  IP: Logged
obscurantist
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 8238

posted 17 June 2005 04:52 PM      Profile for obscurantist     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Originally posted by Tape_342:


I just saw a show on VH1 called Bubblegum Babylon, and the composer of Yummy confirms that, yes, it is a paen to that which we all surmised.


A paean to an accidentally swallowed piece of bubblegum, I'm guessing?


From: an unweeded garden | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged
beluga2
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 3838

posted 18 June 2005 01:27 AM      Profile for beluga2     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Forget bubblegum. In the annals of lyrical awfulness, highest honours must be reserved for 70s prog-rock: possibly the only genre of music in which every single song by every single artist qualifies under the "Worst Lyrics Ever" category.

This particular album's lyrics, however, must evoke hushed, awed respect even by prog-rock standards: Yes - Tales from Topographic Oceans

quote:
Dawn of light lying between a silence and sold sources,
Chased amid fusions of wonder, in moments hardly seen forgotten,
Coloured in pastures of chance dancing leaves cast spells of challenge,
Amused but real in thought, we fled from the sea whole.
Dawn of thought transfered through moments of days undersearching earth
Revealing corridors of time provoking memories, disjointed but with purpose,
Craving penetrations offer links with the self instructors sharp
And tender love as we took to the air, a picture of distance.
Dawn of our power we amuse redescending as fast as misused
Expression, as only to teach love as to reveal passion chasing
Late into corners, and we danced from the ocean.
Dawn of love sent within us colours of awakening among the many
Won't to follow, only tunes of a different age.
As the links span our endless caresses for the freedom of life everlasting.

Almost as good are the album's liner notes, where the band, er, "explain" what these grandiose pronouncements "mean":

quote:
All our thoughts, impressions, knowledge, fears, have been developing for millions of years. What we can relate to is our own past, our own life, our own history. Here, it is especially Rick's keyboards which bring alive the ebb and flow and depth of our mind's eye; the topographic ocean. Hopefully we should appreciate that given points in time are not so significant as the nature of what is impressed on the mind, and how it is retained and used.

Ah. That clears it up. Thanks.


From: vancouvergrad, BCSSR | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged
Michelle
Moderator
Babbler # 560

posted 18 June 2005 05:32 AM      Profile for Michelle   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
beluga2:

Ah, the pretentiousness. I had a boyfriend who was absolutely CRAZY about Yes (and a few other prog-rock bands) and tried to convert me. Being the musical sieve that I am, I listened and didn't dislike everything I heard, but it certainly did strike me as pretty self-conscious and precious. I enjoyed some of the other stuff he liked a lot more.

Well, I've nominated it before in past threads, and I'll nominate it again:

quote:
Bobby's Girl

(You're not a kid anymore)
(You're not a kid anymore)

When people ask of me,
What would you like to be
Now that your not a kid anymore.
(You're not a kid anymore)

I know just what to say,
I answer right away,
Theres just one thing I've been wishing for...

I want to be Bobby's girl
I want to be Bobby's girl,
That's the most important thing to me...

And if I was Bobby's girl,
If I was Bobby's girl,
What a faithful thankful girl I'd be.

Each night I sit at home,
Hoping that he will phone,
But I know Bobby has someone else

Still in my heart I pray
There soon will come the day
That I will have him all to myself...

I want to be Bobby's girl
I want to be Bobby's girl,
That's the most important thing to me...

And if I was Bobby's girl,
If I was Bobby's girl,
What a faithful thankful girl I'd be.
What a faithful thankful girl I'd be.



From: I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Tommy_Paine
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 214

posted 18 June 2005 10:12 AM      Profile for Tommy_Paine     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
Bad lyrics have to be defined. To me, it could be lyrics that don't fit the music-- words that are hammered together to fit the tune, such as:

"In the desert, you can't remember your name for there ain't no one for to give you no pain." From America's "Horse With No Name."

Then there's lyrics that seem to flow with no respect to the tune, such as the oft mentioned "If I had a rocket launcher" by our good friend, Bruce Cockburn. Or "Sudbury Saturday Night" by Stompin' Tom.

Then there are comicaly bad lyrics, like the annology in Macarthur park. Cakes in the rain. It is quite funny, really.


Then there's just plain wrong lyrics, of which the champion must be Alanis Morrisettes "Isn't it Ironic", where she displays how she fell asleep in grade 10 English class the day they took the subject of irony.

Then there are insipid lyrics, and I offer anything by "Styx", but perhaps these tunes stand out: "Babe" and "Mr. Roboto".

I nominate the above in their respective catagories.


From: The Alley, Behind Montgomery's Tavern | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged
kingblake
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 3453

posted 18 June 2005 03:01 PM      Profile for kingblake     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
I'm surprised you didn't pick my personal favorite line from 'Horse with no name': "The heat was hot". So descriptive.
From: In Regina, the land of Exotica | Registered: Dec 2002  |  IP: Logged
Nikita
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 9050

posted 20 June 2005 12:05 AM      Profile for Nikita     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
This is the worst thing I've heard in a while.
quote:

Mario - How Could You
It's kinda crazy baby,
How I remember things, (like where you came from and how you had nothin)
I went and made you fly,
Put extras on your ride, (didn't miss a birthday now u cant even remember mine)
...
How Could You teach him all the things I taught You?
How Could You put him up to the Ghetto Karmasutra?
...
I damn near carried you,
I could've married you,
Good thing I found out b4 I bought that 7karate for ya
...
Sometimes I cant help but think that another man's gonna get the one I made for me
...


Ghetto Karmasutra?

[ 20 June 2005: Message edited by: Nikita ]


From: Regina | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
f1 dad
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 6141

posted 20 June 2005 02:14 AM      Profile for f1 dad     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
There's an Aerosmith song "Amazing" with vile, cliché ridden lyrics. (Even by Aerosmith standards.) I'd post them, but I'm worried that they might break the internet.
From: Toronto | Registered: Jun 2004  |  IP: Logged
Papal Bull
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 7050

posted 20 June 2005 02:16 AM      Profile for Papal Bull   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
quote:
Aerosmith - Amazing


I kept the right ones out
And let the wrong ones in
Had an angel of mercy to see me through all my sins
There were times in my life
When I was goin' insane
Tryin' to walk through
The pain
When I lost my grip
And I hit the floor
Yeah, I thought I could leave but couldn't get out the door
I was so sick and tired
Of a livin' a lie
I was wishin' that I
Would die

It's Amazing
With the blink of an eye you finally see the light
It's Amazing
When the moment arrives that you know you'll be alright
It's Amazing
And I'm sayin' a prayer for the desperate hearts tonight

That one last shot's a Permanent Vacation
And how high can you fly with broken wings?
Life's a journey not a destination
And I just can't tell just what tomorrow brings

You have to learn to crawl
Before you learn to walk
But I just couldn't liten to all that righteous talk
I was out on the street,
Just a tryin' to survive


Ewww, he is right. But luckily the internet hasn't brokened down yet.


From: Vatican's best darned ranch | Registered: Oct 2004  |  IP: Logged
Screaming Lord Byron
rabble-rouser
Babbler # 4717

posted 21 June 2005 12:04 AM      Profile for Screaming Lord Byron     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post
I can't believe I forgot the lyrical 'genius' of Van Dyke Parks.

'A diamond necklace played the pawn
Hand in hand some drummed along, oh
To a handsome man and baton
A blind class aristocracy
Back through the opera glass you see
The pit and the pendulum drawn
Columnated ruins domino

Canvass the town and brush the backdrop
Are you sleeping?

Hung velvet overtaken me
Dim chandelier awaken me
To a song dissolved in the dawn
The music hall a costly bow
The music all is lost for now
To a muted trumperter swan
Columnated ruins domino

Canvass the town and brush the backdrop
Are you sleeping, Brother John?

Dove nested towers the hour was
Strike the street quicksilver moon
Carriage across the fog
Two-Step to lamp lights cellar tune
The laughs come hard in Auld Lang Syne

The glass was raised, the fired rose
The fullness of the wine, the dim last toasting
While at port adieu or die'

To be fair, the man is an extraordinary string arranger.


From: Calgary | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged

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