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There are many sites solely dedicated to the discussion of how much Canada sucks, most of which are dominated by the rantings of people who would have to study hard and apply themselves to become ignorant asses.

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Article from Oregon St. U Paper:

"Weir was Canadian, now he is one of us"
by Brad A. Banning

Mike Weir won last weekend's Masters golf tournament and Canada cheered their
new hero. No Canadian-born player had ever won a major championship in golf, but
after seeing how Canada claimed this guy as their hero, it proved to me how
hollow the Canadians' arguments are.

Weir, born in Canada, resides in Utah full time, went to college at BYU, and makes
his living on an American tour, so I say that makes him as much American as
Canadian.

And after all, why would a professional golfer such as Weir want to live in Canada?

I think his decision and others speaks volumes about Canada as a country.

Canada also claims Wayne Gretzky who happens to be married to a stunning
American woman (probably because there are none of that caliber in Canada),
lives, pays taxes, and raises his children in Scottsdale. He's made his fortune in
America and runs the Phoenix Coyotes hockey franchise.

Canadians obviously have this as well as other things all half-ass backwards.

Canada is a country that is one of America's larger trading partners, yet they boo
our national anthem because their Prime Minister opposes the war in Iraq.

How nice of them.

What exactly does their PM do?

I'd love to pose that question to the guy, but he's probably too busy mingling with
the equally worthless French Prime Minister. Between those two and the Iraqi
Information Minister, I'm not sure anyone would ever want to be a minister of
anything ever again.

Does Canada even have a military?

While researching this, I found that Canada in fact does.

They have eight guys on horseback doning mount-me hats and wielding super
soakers. They have five rubber rafts -- two patrolling the Pacific and three in the
Atlantic -- that are constantly protecting their frozen land from invaders by sea.
They have four planes in a hanger in Nova Scotia just in case. And they have one
tank on loan from the U.S. because we're nice.

And what is this currency they use?

The Queen of England is on the money of a country with millions of people who
speak French?

Canada is good for very few things: They import the most oil to the States, they
have Whistler and Blackcomb mountains and I'm told parts of the country are ideal
if you are a bong jockey.

Oh, and don't forget the hockey players they provide to the (American) National
Hockey League. Gotta love the Stanley Cup Playoffs.

Does anyone see an American athlete going into Canada, living full time for the
duration of their adult life, starting a family, becoming successful in the public eye
and then us claiming that they're our number two national hero?

Nope.

Canada is only there because the U.S. doesn't need the land yet. We let them
exist because we're nice guys and gals. But give it a few years. Once we're done
with Iraq, Iran, Syria, North Korea, France, or whoever else misbehaves, we'll turn
our attention to making Canada our 51st state.

We'll get rid of the Frenchies in the Parliament like we got rid of the Taliban in
Afghanistan. At that point we won't have to see or hear all these Canadians trying
to claim what's ours as theirs. Congrats to Weir, but he's as American as they
come.

[ 28 April 2003: Message edited by: Willowdale Wizard ]