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Really? I always see him at the bar...

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So you're drinking a lot or he's studying to be a lawyer?

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Harumph. I resent this vicious insinuation, as I believe in constitutes an attack on my character. I mean, come on! A lawyer?

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"It was global cooling 30 years ago...and it's global warming now. And neither of us will be here 100 years from now to know what it is. But I can tell you, our grandchildren will laugh at those who predicted global warming. We'll be cooler by then, if the lord hasn't returned....The fact is that there is no global warming."

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(bold mine)

See, this is what pisses me off about the literalist flat-earth Bible-thumping conservative idiots like Falwell. Their whole philosophy is basically, "Be a bigot for the Lord, and feel free to rape and pillage the environment because Jesus is gonna come and rapture us soon anyhow."

Anyone who doesn't think that this particular end-of-the-world logic doesn't figure in even moderately religious conservatives like Dubya and crew are kidding themselves.

But then they just go confess, and it's all better, and then they get to start up all over again.

And I think that about sums it up.

I'm secular-born and Calvinist-bred, but you know, Catholics have much nicer churches and much less dour...well...almost everything. Although I do kind of like the Calvinist idea of salvation by grace alone, at least as I interpret it in my half-assed secular way. "Eh, screw it, it's not in my hands." Except there must be more to it than that, or else Calvinists wouldn't have a reputation for being sombre and self-denying, and you'd go to Protestant cities for good old-fashioned sin.

Too bad Catharism never really took off. That one was great - all material pleasures are equally bad, so don't bother getting married because it's hypocritical, drink a lot of wine, have a lot of sex, be merry, and as long as you become an ascetic before you die...even if it's only a few days before you die...it's all good. That's a religion my hedonistic secular ass could live with.

[ November 28, 2002: Message edited by: Smith ]

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Catholics have more fun. It's true. Don't tell Falwell.

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There are three major truths about religion:

His "Young Lutheran's Guide to the Orchestra" still breaks me up every time. (After working our way through and eliminating every other instrument, we discover that a young Lutheran may only play percussion -- because you don't get to play often, but when you do, you have to be perfect -- or harp -- obvious reasons, I guess.)